Friday, October 18, 2019
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Ours Is Young Love But How Can We Overcome All Odds?

Good afternoon ma’am,
Ā I’m Jane by name, I’m 20 years old in 200 level….and I’m in a very serious relationship.
Though,I gained admission before my partner…. He’s been writing but yet to be admitted….. He decided to take a polytechnic form as a part time student…..
I love him so much and he loves me too..he promised me marriage…he is a very responsible man..Godly and very caring….but by the time I would be in service.
He would still be there in school…I am confused at this stage…I don’t know what to do…with these challenges:
1.We are age mates(even birthday months-I am January 10,hes January 21,I am even a week older than him)
2.Background differences(he is from a broken home..his mom and dad aren’t together…but mine are complete)
3.He are academically different(He is behind me)
4.Tribally different(I am from Oyo state.. And he is from Kogi.)
But there is one more thing. He’s scared of losing me because I’m now in the university…
The truth is,I can never cheat on him neither can he do that….Not that he doesn’t trust me..but he wants me to know how serious he is about us…about him getting to marry me 5 years to come….that he wants us to make an oath….
I told him,I believe in him…and his promises…that there is no need for an oath…
He kept on saying,that is how much he can prove his words to me and the rest of mind that he wont lose me to someone else…
Please,I need your advicešŸ˜ž
From Anonymous LS Whatsapp Member
Photo Credit:NBC News

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A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Hello Jane,

    I see nothing wrong with all the “challenges ” you listed .There is nothing wrong in marrying your age mate as long as he is mature…and you already mentioned he is a good man abi?

    From different tribe…that’s not a problem..most People marry outside thier tribe…I did too

    He is behind academically…its just life…the first to start is not the first to finish…that’s life…I know many people married their husbands who were still in school.

    My dear….the only challenge I see is you.

    Will you be willing to accept a good man who is not perfect?

    Will you be ashamed of him one day when your friends or family see that he is behind academically?

    will you be faithful to him when other guys start toasting you?

    A good man is hard to Find

    You are just 20…both of you are very young….in a few years time,you may not like each other as much

    Time my dear will tell…

    My only advice for you is…

    If he is indeed a good man, hold on to him and overcome every challenge together

    You will need patience and darn what anyone will say or think

    Marriage is serious so many people fail at

    The best of making marriage work is to make sure you marry your best friend…someone who has your back…someone will be there for you no matter what

    Did you say he is from a broken home?

    Many people also have come from broken homes

    People like that have seen their parents mistake and do not want to make same mistakes

    At the end of the day …Be his friend.

    If you are not ready for marriage…free yourselves…you are very young…there’s enough time to decide

    But of you choose to be with him ….Then be ready to stand by him and ride the storms of life together

    As for him asking you to take an oath…Well..I dont blame him for thinking this way

    Me I already feel you have doubts about him based on issues you raised

    But never agree to an oath

    I honestly think both of you need to free yourselves

    You are too young

    Anything can change in 5 years time

    You are both not even ready

    You cannot tie each other down

    Go and explore…discover yourself…discover things…ne more mature.

    Let him do the same

    Break up when the timing is not right is not a bad thing

    But if you guys keep in touch as friends,perhaps you can still reconnect and end up marrying in future

    God bless you


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