Good evening ma,
Please post this story for me. My friend came to me for advice,he wants to end his marriage of 11 years. He came to me seeking my opinion whether to go ahead and dissolve his marriage. He is very hurt. I do not know what to say to him. That is why I brought this to lively stones.
My friend got involved in some shady deals about five years ago. He trusted the wrong people and ended up going to prison for four years. When he went to prison,his wife was devastated. They did not have much support as they had spent most of their money on the lawsuit. The wife even lost her job . She had to go into petty trading to survive when her husband was incarcerated.
During the time the husband was in jail,the prison life was very tough for him. He was getting into trouble in jail with the system. One time,he was beaten so much that he fell sick. The prison warden also would not allow the wife see her husband.They did not have a lawyer anymore. Generally things were very bad for the man.
The prison wardens started to take advantage of the situation. The wife was told that if she wanted to see her husband,she would have to make them ”happy”. By that,she would have to do s*xual favors for them. And she was warned not tell anyone or her husband would be killed in jail. Out of fear,she complied.
My friend’s wife was allowed to see the husband as long as she kept the wardens happy. Somehow,rumors started to fly and got to her husband that his wife was cheating on him. He confronted her but she denied it. This woman went through a lot just so she can keep this man safe in jail.
Four years later,my friend was released. He was happy to be home and his wife too was very happy. They started to try to build their lives back. But in an act of wickedness,the wardens sent pictures and videos of my friend’s wife when she was servicing them to him. My friend was devastated. He wanted to kill his wife. But she began to explain and cry,telling him he did it for him.
It took alot of begging from so many people,family for him not to kill her. But their marriage has never been the same. They have been having difficulty over the last one year. He wants to divorce her but he also feels responsible for their problems. He blames himself for the things the wife did. But he could not love her like normal.
Last week,he came to me to say,he has been seeing a lady for a month. He is not happy in his marriage. He wants to start afresh. But he feels very bad that he may seen be as abandoning his wife after all she went through for him. But he says,anytime he looks at the wife,all he sees are the filthy prison officers ravaging her body.
My friend needs help. His marriage has two children. He wants to build his family but he cannot move past what happened with his wife. Now,he seems to be in love with someone else. He wants advice on what to do. Should he move on and continue to wait to see if his marriage will ever be restored or is it over?
Please advice my friend as I really do not know what to tell him. He and his family have suffered so much..
Photo Credit:Financial Times