Friday, October 18, 2019
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My True Love Story – It Took Two Marriages To Find Us

Someone posted a story of a few days ago asking if there was hope for him and his already married lady. (Click here if you missed the story).This is my answer of hope and faith in true love to him. It is not fiction. THIS IS MY STORY. I will try and summarize it.

Benny (Not real name) was my first ever girl friend. I met her in her cousin’s birthday party when i was 17 and she was 21. Nobody gave us a chance as I had nothing and was just in my first year in the university while she was in her 3rd year, so everyone thought she was stupid for been with someone she was 4yrs older than.

My Mum, Dad, siblings and everyone around me loved her. We dated for 9 solid years with no cheating on each side and we were happy. She graduated before me and men started asking for her hand in marriage. Despite all, she said NO to them hoping and waiting on me. Benny believed so much in me that i was scared of her belief in me. If I ask her to sit down and never move, she will obey me without asking any question despite been 4years older.

My story changed in a big way when I was just 20 and she was standing with me. Marrying Benny when I was even 22 was not a problem for me then but my fear was thinking I was problem for me then but my fear was thinking I was too young to be married. When I was 26 and Benny 31, I decided and went with my family to ask for her hand in marriage but her father who is an Anglican Bishop said NO to me and my people.

His reasons, I was too young for his daughter and my source of wealth at that age was questionable to him. (At 25, in1996 I was already living in my own house and had 2 good cars). Dating someone 4yrs older changed me a great deal and helped speed up my maturity. This was one of the major reasons my Mum loved Benny. I never hid anything from Benny and she knew how my integrity and drive for business and success at that time led me to a man who let me work for him as his eye in his company doing remediation contracts with SPDC where I stopped and uncovered many frauds by his staff members running into millions of dollars and he was paying me unimaginably well.

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I met my (Ex) Mandy in the cause of the struggle to convince Bennys Dad to say yes to our marriage. She came my way, and after 9 solid years of dating Benny and she haven said NO to about 7 suitors because of her hope of getting married to me, my Ex (Mandy) made me abandon Benny and I ended up marrying her (Ex). Despite age not on her side, for 9 years after I got married Benny stayed unmarried still praying and hoping for me.

At some point I told her to move on hoping for me. At some point I told her to move on with her life as she was not getting younger. But she said NO. That it is me (a married man at that time) or no one else… My marriage started having issues and 9 years after getting married I was in court for a divorce from my Ex. On one of my days in court I met someone who told me Benny was getting married traditionally on that particular day.

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I was devastated as I thought was going back to her after my divorce. Benny never knew about my family issues and did not also know about my divorce because I completely cut her off. After waiting for 10yrs and exactly two days after I officially got divorced, Benny got married in church at 40. I cried in my closet and decided to close her chapter in my life and move on.

8years after my divorce, I couldn’t work it out with anyone. I tried oh, it just did not fit. Not at all. Seven years after she got married, I heard Benny was divorced. I tried to find out what happened but the information I got was little. When I finally heard from her, it was a case of lies and deceit on the part of the man she married. She also told me she kept comparing him with me and the difference was clear.

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As I write this, Benny is by my side. We parted ways 20yrs ago. We parted ways 20yrs ago. I was married to someone else for 9yrs with 2 children. Benny was married to another for 7yrs with no child. She is 48 now, still looking beautiful and s*xy and I will choose her over any younger lady..

Everything I am today is tied to God and Benny. She told me, “I doubt if I can still give you a child” and I said “Don’t worry you already have a son and a daughter”. We are planning on get married later this year.

Least I forget, I left Benny with a B.sc degree but she came back to me with a Doctorate degree in Management from the university of Lagos. So my wife will now be known as Dr. Mrs. Benny ????…. My advice to you young man is this. Keep your cool, no matter how it plays out, love will WIN finally.

Do not wish her, her marriage or husband any evil. Do not wish her, her marriage or husband any evil. Let life play its game of chess. It also has its way of balancing things. Keep your hands clean, be a man of integrity and also be a GOOD MAN.

If she is meant for you, IT CAN NEVER WORK WITH ANYONE ELSE. Those that feel you no dey try, or that you are waiting for an already married woman are talking from a point of safety. The most dangerous kind of love is when two people find themselves by themselves.

It is what no one understands except those involved. At a point the waters will stir up roughly and as in the bible, bros, jump in, get your healing and the wave will bring her your way again. Who says there are no SOUL MATES?

 

Story Above is as Written by A Member of LS Whatsapp Group

 

Photo Credit:Self

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Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

1 COMMENT

  1. Wow,

    Thank you for sharing your story with us….I hope it helps anyone in a similar situation.

    In any case,it may not work for everyone the way it did yours….love is what you do,the success of your marriage is how you water it,work at it…do everything you can to make it work.

    But in the end,it takes two to tango….

    Keep believing in love…..love never fails!

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