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My Mother Does Not Trust My Boyfriend: Please Advice!

Good day,

I’m in need of counselling .I’ve been in a serious relationship for about 19 months now
It has been a good one and I’m grateful to God that I met him.I can boldly say that I’m a better person because of him.

I met him through my mom’s ‘friend’ who happened to be his sister in law. She’s actually a complicated person and has been uncomfortable with the fact that the relationship is thriving. We actually did not let that affect us not until she started poisoning my mom’s mind against him.

I actually didn’t see any reason to be worried cos I’ve been praying and my boo tries his best to reassure me of the future we have together by God’s grace.

Lately, he has not been coming to visit my family like he used to, …and that’s due to some pressure at work and all(he got a new job and he’s preparing for a major exam)… in spite of that, he makes sure he sees me every weekend and tries to always be there for me.

He said it last weekend that he knows my mom might be having doubts already cos he’s not around like he used to…not knowing that my mom would bring it up last night right after church

She called and started talking about ‘marital delay(I’m 26 years by the way) that she sees my boo as being deceitful and that she has been ‘praying’. She said that my boo doesn’t make out time for me… whereas because of her attitude towards him of late, I don’t even let her know when we go out or when we see each other.

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All this is mainly because of the things my boo’s sister in law says to her (at least that’s what I think )

It’s funny because this is someone that has supported us many times after I lost my dad last year… he tries his best. I simply told her that the way she’s seeing it.’s not how it is. This is a man that stands by me, supports me, helps me improve in my career and all. Yes no one is perfect but he has been good to me

Meanwhile, I’ve never really liked my mom’s mentality towards relationship and marriage, I love her, she’s my mom, she inspires me in so many ways but just not in that aspect.

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My only worry here is how do I change her orientation about him? I’ve started praying and all but I don’t know if I should discuss this with him as well?


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Photo Credit:Mother In Style Magazine

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A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. hello dear,

    Mothers are very special and can e over protective. She only wants whats best for you even if she does not always see the bigger picture all the time.

    I actually do not see a big issue here.All you and your guy need to do is prove that ‘friend’ wrong by staying true to each other. If your guy keeps proving he has the right intentions about you,in time,your mom will come to accept him.

    26 is young…dating for 19 months..its ok…give it another 3-6 months to watch and pray…observe your guy’s behavior a little more

    In the meantime,is he talking marriage or just dating? If he is not being definite about marriage…that is something you should talk to him about…

    Give it a little time,let him continue to be the guy you described and let him tell you what his real intentions about you are….

    you will all be fine….


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