Thursday, November 14, 2019
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My Girlfriend Is Getting Married To A Man She Does Not Love

Hi,

I am Yusuuf  from Kano. I am 26 years old.Please I have and issue with my girl that I hope to marry after NYSC next year,.

She stays in my village in Kano state Nigeria. Her parents are literates but she is brilliant and has a bright future . She will finish her WAEC this year and pass with good grades.

She is hoping to further her education but they are forcing her to stop school and marry one OLDMAN, old to be her father and shes just 18 while he is 52.

It got to a level that she ran from the village but they caught her back and do the wedding that she must go to the man house in Kaduna. The man acts like he is rich and meanwhile he is not.

Everybody gives bad comment about him, he is a man who marries and Divorce and humiliate women after pleasure but the parents due to materialism and ignorant they are forcing she must go to him.

We are thinking of taking the issue to Court or HUMAN RIGHT but we don’t have any connection or way to know how to save her please.

I need advise and help or guide thanks.

 

Yusuuf

Anonymous LS Whatsapp member

 

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Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

2 COMMENTS

  1. Hello,

    Thank you for your email. This is not an easy matter.

    First, your girl,is her parents aware of your relationship with their daughter? Have you made your intentions known to them? …if you have….maybe they are looking at the other ‘RICH’ man…..I dont know…but as a youth corper,they may think you cannot take care of their daughter.

    Now,this girl is 18. That is the legal age in Nigeria so she can get married if she wants to. But if its a forced marriage,then maybe she can approach the legal system to help her.

    Note,you have to be careful how you get involved if it is tending to a legal case. Because you are not related to her and you are not her husband. Be very careful.

    If she really wants help out of the situation,let her meet any human rights NGO or approach the legal system. I will take my time to research any of these bodies and get their contact details to you.

    But note,you cannot do this for her…only her can do this.

    Maybe she can approach some other family members ,extended family members who can help her speak to her parents to put an end to this forced marriage.

    Its a very sensitive matter. She can also approach the police to help her. The only concern is our society and the culture: I hope this does not turn against her.

    Ideally,at 18…she should not even be thinking of marriage. She should be thinking of schooling.

    All you can do is advise her to appeal to her extended family members to intervene and also seek help from NGOs,the police and get a Human Rights lawyer to try to help. Get the contact details of these agencies but do not be the one championing this….she or a family member should…otherwise,you can get in trouble with her family.

    Be very careful.

    I hope she gets the help she needs.

    God bless

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