My Fiancee Refused To Listen When I Cautioned Her


Dear Jzhane,

Please help me. I just broke up with my fiancee and my heart is seriously broken. I am hurting and seriously need her. I wish I could stop feeling this way. I literally cannot function since we broke up. I want her back but she hurt me so bad. Will I ever be able to forgive her or is this truly the end?

I love Anna with my last breathe. She is the most beautiful woman I ever laid eyes on. From the moment I set eyes on her almost two years ago,I knew she was the one. We met at a mutual friend’s traditional wedding. She was the sexiest girl at the event. All eyes were on her instead of the


I introduced myself and we got talking instantly. It was easy to talk to her. Anna is very friendly,easy going and her laugh is very infectious. I knew guys had eyes for her everywhere she went to. I was envious but a few months after talking on phone and whatsapp,I told her I wanted to date her and she was like:what took you so long? I mean,it was easy to love her. She was simple,down to earth and understands people.

My family loves her too. My friends,everyone. We went everywhere together. She was my best friend. We got engaged early this year. Anna is also adventurous. She liked to make new friends. So when she made a new friend in her office with a youth corps guy,I don’t know but my senses were triggered. I knew this was unusual. She was always talking about him.

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I cautioned her about her closeness with the guy. They were always chatting with him. Laughing as they chatted. I grew quite jealous and just ignored her. She noticed and stopped talking about him to me. I also noticed that anytime he called her in my presence,she would ignore his calls. I asked her why,she said she was doing it for me …since I was uncomfortable with it. I thought that was smart.

Gradually,I began to forget about the corper guy until two weeks ago.I called Anna but she didn’t pick up. I sent sms,no response. Much later,she sent an sms saying she was sick. I was worried sick and immediately after work,I went to see her. She looked like she had been crying more than sick. I asked her what was wrong,she said she suspected malaria. So I told her I wanted to take her to the hospital,she refused.

I was surprised. I pressed but she insisted that she took drugs and would soon be fine. I stayed with her but I knew something else was wrong..not just malaria.I began to coax her and tell her to tell me what the problem was . I made her realize that I was there for her no matter what. She said:do you mean that really? I said yes….emphatically.

I was not ready,I should not have said so. Anna started crying and telling me how sorry she was. That she was a fool and all. That she has wronged me and prays I forgive her. By this time,I was beyond tensed. She said that she had slept with the corper guy mistakenly and now,the guy has nude pictures of her and is threatening to post them online except she agrees to have a threesome with him.

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According to her,it was only once they had sx but forgive me if I do not believe her. For her to even invite the guy to her place when I am not there was to much to bear. I called the guy and threatened to kill him if he went ahead with his blackmailing threat. He said,he does not care about my slut girlfriend. I am beyond broken. Anna is not the type of girl to be entangled in this kind sht…or have I been wrong about her all these while.

So we broke up. She has been begging and sending messages to me,asking for forgiveness. Saying if I were the one who made this same mistake she would forgive me cos what we have is more important than the mistake she made. I wished she realized that before sleeping with the guy…

Jzhane,I am missing my girl like crazy but the thought of another man making love to her is haunting me like an unending night mare…what do I do..should I move on?





Photo Credit:Medium

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  1. Hello Joe,

    To err is human. Anna made a grave mistake and if you love her,please forgive her. It will take a long time ot heal and forget about this hurt but I see you really do not want to loose her…so do not let her go.

    The fact that she told you the truth..she was crying and feeling truly bad about what she did..I think she knows now that she was foolish.

    I think you guys can still make this work. Attend counseling together so you can discuss issues and what went wrong so that you can both address those issues even as you make plans to move forward together.

    I wish you all the best.

  2. Honestly, she brought this on herself
    Its been said that whoever brings home termite-infested wood for cooking, should also be ready to accept lizards that will come for the termites in the house
    There’s always limit to a certain friendship or relationship.
    But once you throw all caution to the wind and just wanna have fun, be ready for any consequence that might arise
    Honestly, I do say love conquers all, but put yourself in this guy’s shoe, he warned her, started ignoring the corper’s call and the rest.

    What can I say? Maybe the threat to release the nude is just mere threat, or maybe the guy was serious but I honestly think, just like some guys do, he kissed and told his colleague, so the colleague wants his own taste and now there’s the threat. Believe me, when I say, it has all been a setup from the get go
    My advice, bros take time out, clear your head. Don’t take any decision cos of people has seen you a lot with her or your people knows her very well. Just do it for yourself and the love in your heart


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