My Elder Sister Is Blaming Me For Her Husband’s Infidelity


Dear Jzhane,

I am seriously furious and I need someone to talk to me and tell me what to do. My elder sister has been married for four years but she and her husband has been having issues from day one. Most of their issues is based on the fact that the husband is a serial cheater. I think she knew before she got married to him. She was actually pregnant so she had no choice but to get married.

However,what I did not envisage is that someone close to me will take advantage of their situation. Its painful enough to watch my sister live in this kind of marriage but for my best friend to be making it worse is beyond me. Yes,I found out that my best friend is dating my sister’s husband. Recently,my best friend’s behavior changed.Anytime her phone rang,she would go somewhere else to answer it,that is how I knew she was seeing someone she didn’t want me to know about.


Unfortunately for them,I got a last minute invite to pool party last weekend. I did not tell my friend ..well,she has been hiding things from me too. On getting to the party,I saw her and my sister’s husband hanging out and making out. I was so angry and I actually fought her. The he-goat of a husband just left us in all the chaos. That is the first time I would ever be involved in a fight with anyone in my life.

Of course,I told my sister about her .To my surprise,mys sister is blaming me for it. Saying,I should have known the kind of friend I have and for bringing her around her husband and her home. I feel so bad. I have been apologizing to my sister. What is paining me is that,my friend who is now my enemy,is still seeing this man. I do not know what to do to stop her. I have threatened her and promised to disgrace her on social media but she is not even flinching. Clearly,she is enjoying all the money the man is spending on her.

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I contemplated reporting her to her mother but it will kill the poor woman. Her mother was a single mother whom their father abused until she almost died. Her other siblings are her younger siblings,how can they help? Every time I think about this,I am filed with so much hate and rage that I have crazy thoughts about what to do to this girl. I feel like hiring thugs to beat her up.

Please advise me.What do I do? I feel responsible for this problem and I also feel its my responsibility to fix this problem. My sister has two children with her husband and she is still hoping he will change one day. I feel so bad..I know my friend is not the only one her husband is seeing but what should I do?


From Clara,



Photo Credit:Imagenesmy


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  1. Hello Clara,

    My response surprises even me: like how do you even allow such a friend get close to such a husband? Didn’t you know your best friend well enough to know that she has cheating tendencies?Its like leaving the goat beside the yam and do not expect that the goat will eat the yam?

    I am for disgracing this friend of yours on social media but that would probably also embarrass your sister….what else can you do?

    Sending thugs after her could go wrong and someone could end up dead or assaulted and you could be implicated…

    Prevention would have been way better than not bring any female friends near your sister’s husband again…

    I think you should leave them alone to their foolishness,one day,karma will catch up with them



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