I Was Forced To Marry A Man Twice My Age,Now My Life Is At Risk!


Dear Jzhane,

Please hide my identity cos I am afraid even as I write this. I don’t want anyone who knows me to trace this back to me. My name is Banke (not real name). I am 20 years old. I got married last year at the age of 19 to a man that is 48 years old. He is a from a different faith as me. I am a christian and he is not.

Actually,things have not been easy for my family. My father died when I was 13. I have six other siblings and my mother is a petty trader. It was very hard to cater for all of us. I had to drop out of school. I began to do petty trading and house girl work until my mother forcefully arranged for me to be married to this 48 years old man.


I have been married for over a year and I am seriously not happy. I cried the day I was married off. I wanted to run away but I couldn’t cos I was scared. I have been crying almost day for the last one year. In this marriage,my husband does not talk to me. the only interaction we have is when he wants s*x. I am lonely. He is hardly at home. I hear rumors that he has another woman who has a child for him that he spends most of his time with. I can’t even try to talk to him,there is no relationship with him at all.

Recently,I have been thinking I cannot continue like this. If I do,I will die of misery in this marriage. His father,my father in law has also been threatening me.The father in law is a mean man. Rumor has it that he is fetish and he does not want any of his children to do well in life hence,my husband and none of his siblings are rich. But my greatest fear is that my father in law has threatened to kill me if I dare try to leave this marriage.

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I feel like I am in prison. I need help. What can I do? I feel like running away but I feel also that the father in law will trace me and hurt me. Please,help me ma. My life is not worth living like this. I need help fast.


From Banke (Not real name)

Kwara State


Photo Credits:Masterlife



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  1. Dear Banke,

    I sympathize with you on your situation. My dear,if you fear for your life as a result of the threat from the father in law,please go straight to the nearest police station and make a statement. Its important to have it on record that there is a potential threat to your life.

    Secondly,seeing you were married against your will,please consult a lawyer who will advice you on your rights and guide you on the next steps.

    Whatever you do,please be careful. Dont confide in just anyone. be very prayerful.

    I only wish you were in Lagos. It would have been easier to bring your case to the office of the public defender or ministry of women affairs. They can help you with legal counsel and shelter while you try to figure things out.

    We will be praying with you and we will also try and reach out to some NGOs to see if they can assist you in any way.

    God protect you my dear from all harm in Jesus name.

  2. All she need is protection especially that of police.
    Please engage prayer and be close to a living church since your father-in-law is fetish he might use charm on you.


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