Wednesday, February 19, 2020
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I Played A Dirty Game But I Was Not Unfaithful To My Fiance

Good evening Admin,

My fiance and I have been managing our long distance relationship for almost two years. When he moved to Ethiopia to study,he wanted us to get engaged and  even do traditional marriage so that I can be rest assured that he will come back and marry me.

I agreed to getting engaged but I felt it would be too much to have a traditional wedding. I have heard so many stories of ladies being tied down by men for marriage when they go abroad and live their lives as they please. I didn’t want that.

We talk on phone all the time…as much as his schedule can accommodate that but there are times I wish he was physically around. To keep my mind engaged,I joined some social media groups. That was how I connected with a fool who is trying now to ruin my life.

After chatting with this complete stranger for weeks,he convinced me to have some dirty conversations with him just for the fun of it. I have never met this guy before. Just only on social media. On telegram actually. Not long,our dirty talk became like phone s*x. I admit I was stupid too but in my mind,it was not a physical thing …we were just messing around.

Little did I know this guy was setting me up. About two months later,he uploaded voice messages of our conversation on facebook and he tagged all my friends including my fiance. By the time I realized what he had done,my fiance already was calling my phone.

Now,I am so scared that I have not even picked up his call. I have deleted my facebook account. I have been crying like a big fool that I am.My fiance sent me text ,messages calling me all kinds of names. Accusing me of cheating on him with several men.I don’t know how I got to where I am in this mess but I am not that type of girl. I got carried away in a dirty game I thought we were just playing.

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I know my fiance may never forgive me but my friend says I should try and talk to him. That my ignoring him maybe perceived as I intentionally wanted to cheat.

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Should I bother to explain myself to him or should I just forget about him and be on my own? I see no point in trying.I have disgraced myself.Is there any need in trying to redeem myself?



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A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Dear Lyna,

    I think you know that you were in the wrong. You are engaged and you are playing dirty with strangers?

    I think you are not ready to settle down…what you did is as serious as cheating. It is known as emotional cheating.

    You need to to speak to your fiance and ask him to forgive you..I do not know if he will forgive you…but you have to try and truly be repentant.

    And I hope you have learnt from this mess.


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