I Love My Husband But He Keeps Hurting My Feelings

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Dear Jzhane,

I am extremely angry and I don’t know who to talk to. I have been married for almost eight years and I love my husband. He is a good man. But only one problem I have with him. My husband does not like to apologize for anything that he does to make me angry or anything he does that is wrong. He can make a mistake like for example,he can shout at me when he is angry abut something. When I tell him that I don’t like him shouting at me,he will just keep quiet and act like nothing happened. This has been going on for years. I know he loves me but why cant he apologize to me when he offends me.

Honestly,I feel he does not regard my feelings or emotions when he behaves like that. I have been trying to ignore him and not expect any apology from him no matter what he does but I wont lie,I get really hurt and I feel like not talking to him for days but I don’t want to keep malice with him so I try to talk to him even though I am not happy.

Sometimes,I try to also talk to him about how I feel,then he will say,me too I don’t use to apologize to him when I am wrong. But ma,that is not true. I apologize but the issue is,I am not the one always wrong. he want me to apologize even though I am not wrong. He is the one that is always wrong. I am not saying I am a saint but I am a very reasonable person,I always put other peoples’ feelings before my own and I know that always comes to bite me.

I know he is not a very romantic man when I married him but I just want him to stop ignoring my feelings. Please what do I do? Do I accept him the way he is or how can I make him understand that he is hurting my feelings?

 

From Mrs X,

Ibadan

Photo Credits:Sorry

 

1 COMMENT

  1. Hello Mrs X,

    Most men from this clime seem to fall into this category of husbands who think apologizing to a woman makes them appear weak.

    That being said,there are men who also find it quite easy to apologize when they indeed find themselves in the wrong.

    Having said this: make sure that you are not the cause of constantly making him upset and in turn,making him refuse to apologize.

    Change your strategy in communication: dont confront him as before,find a different and loving way to explain to him how his actions make you feel.

    If he truly loves you,he would make an attempt not to purposely hurt your feelings and also attempt to apologize when he is wrong.

    Finally…don’t live for an apology. If he is not giving it,don’t fret about it…commit him to God in prayers and focus on other things that make you happy….

    A wise saying goes: don’t depend on your spouse to make you happy…be happy all by yourself!
    God bless.

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