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I Am Feeling Guilty For Falling In Love With My Best Friend’s Girlfriend

Allen and I were buddies way back from secondary school to University. We all grew up in the same neighborhood in Ikoyi as kids. Jessica was also a kid in our neighborhood we all knew. Her family lived in the same compound with Allen’s family. Jessica was in primary six when we were in SS2. She was a pretty girl and most young boys my age and less had a crush on her.

Today,I manage my father’s oil and gas business,doing very well. I am married with a three year old daughter but myself and my wife got separated. It just didnt work out,I guess I married the wrong person. She has since moved on about a year ago.

Allen called me out of the blues five months ago. I hadnt heard from him in life three years. He told me his girlfriend needed a job. He was based in South Africa but his girlfriend who turned out to be little Jessica was in Nigeria in search of a job.He asked if I could help. I agreed instantly,come on,this is like my family. So Jessica started with us five months ago. The only problem was,they didnt live in Ikoyi anymore. They now live in their own house in Mowe. Getting to work in Ikoyi everyday would be a huge challenge so I offered my place for Jessica to move in and have access to work easily.

When Jessica resumed work,I couldnt believe how stunning she looked. Like she was a very hot pretty girl. She would wait for me to close most times so we go home together. I discovered she was such a warm hearted girl,full of life,intelligent and very caring. My daughter took to liking her instantly. Jessica being in my home,even though I have domestic staff,she turned my home into heaven. Her cooking was excellent. She became like a mother to Karen my daughter. They were best friends. And Jessica was good at her job too. I caught myself falling for this girl but I knew it wouldn’t work cos she is like five years my junior and her boyfriend is my buddy. This sucked so bad.

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It was hard but I fought off my attraction for Jessica. She didnt make it any easier too. She would be going around the house in bum shorts. Oh God!

On my birthday,last month,she planned a surprise for me at home. It was just too beautiful. The meal was superb,she had my best friends over,the entire event was just marvelous. My friend Kunle told me at the party that it was getting obvious that Jessica liked me. I didnt know what to think. But at the end of the day,I went to say thank you to Jessica for the party and she kissed me. I acted surprised and she apologized,saying she thought I would like it. At that point,I threw all caution away and kissed her back. We ended up making love that night. I was in love no doubt with Jessie. And she me.

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We have been on for a month now and I must confess,I have never been this happy in my life. But this is also wrong cos Allen is my friend,how am I going to break this to him? Jessie and I have talked about this,she is scared too but she is ready to face him cos she said she has never been loved the way I love her.

I know Allen will hate me for betraying him. He probably would think I got Jessie cos I was richer or something. I value friendship very well,especially loyal friends like Allen. Do you think I should break my relationship with Jessie for the sake of my friendship with Allen? Jessie has said even if we break up,she would never go back to Allen as she is not in love with him anymore but me. I also see that Jessie and I breaking up would hurt us so much. We didnt plan this but we are definitely in love. My daughter too would be crushed.

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If you were in my shoes,what would you do? I would appreciate some really objective and constructive answers or criticism.

Thank you.



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A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Hello Larry,

    You and Jessica are wrong. Please break off the relationship. You may both hurt but let Jessica and her boyfriend sort out their issues first. Is it is meant to be,both of you may get back together after she has broken up with Allen.

    And then,eventually find a way to speak to your buddy Allen…he may never forgive you though but you have the do the right thing!


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