Friday, October 18, 2019
Home Advice How Do I Protect My Husband From This Devious Person?

How Do I Protect My Husband From This Devious Person?

Hello House,

I need your advice. This is really bothering me. So,it happened like this: Last year,My Auntie called me to help assist the daughter that has graduated for almost two years without a job. I was hesitant but she kept using my mother to taunt me. I am a business woman,into buying and selling and I have a big boutique as well.

So,I told my husband and because of the pressure,my husband got her a job in his office. As one of his PAs. He has a male PA. That has always been his style. Since there was really nothing else to offer this cousin of mine,he had to make her like an assistant to that his male PA.

Please note that this cousin of mine is way younger than I am. I am 41,she is 26. Young and attractive. Not too fine sha. I myself,I am cute,at least,I get comments that I am still hot but you get what I mean,she is like young blood.

Last month,God blessed us,we moved into our new home. And we had a house warming party. It was a big party. We had most of our friends and family around. There was a lot of drinking and merry making. Towards evening,most people had had enough alcohol to make them tipsy. I myself,had a few. Guests were already leaving.

I went to lie down a little bit. Hoping my husband would join me a few minutes later. I eventually fell asleep but woke up like an hour later. I think the alcohol was wearing me down.I checked and did not find my husband so I went looking for him. I checked around the house,I did not find him.

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I went to the pent house and though it was dark,I noticed there was someone there. I walked in on my husband and my cousin locked in embrace. Kissing and smooching. I screamed and they fell apart. Immediately my husband started to beg me and this stupid girl ran away without even saying a word to me.

I was seriously hurt by my husband’s action. He swore that he had never done anything with her before now. He even asked me to ask his male PA. He swore that he did not know what got over him. He said it was the alcohol. I felt so betrayed.

But what surprised me was that,my cousin did not say a word to me. I had to call her mother my auntie. The woman just kept quiet. She only said,she will talk to her daughter. Since this incident,I have been trying to move on from the pain I feel but I cannot. This is because,my husband has refused to fire this girl.

I told him that the only way that I can feel at peace again is if this girl goes. Bur my husband says that there was no need to do that. That I should trust him. That even if he fires her,if he means to cheat,he will still do it. That he does not want to punish this girl for his own mistake. That he was the one who went after her.

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We have been married for almost 18 years. My husband has never cheated on me before. He is a good man and very strict. Does not flirt. Every body knows him for that.So this thing that happened is very surprising to me.

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House,what should I do? Should I believe my husband? I feel awkward that this girl or her mother did not even think to apologize to me. What if it is not a mistake as they claimed? I could not tell my mother because I know it will cause serious family problems and it may cause family division.  I am even also embarrassed by the whole debacle.

Is it ok to allow this girl to keep working in my husband’s office? She is not the only one working for him though….I trust my husband…I know him,after talking to him,I know he made a mistake…its just this girl that I do not trust and my husband does not see it that way…I feel like I need to protect my husband from this girl….using her youth and innocence  to lure him…and he has no clue

Also,is it ok that she or her mother did not apologize to me? What should I do please?







Photo Credit:BET

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A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J


  1. Hello madam,

    Thank you for trusting us with your story. To be honest,this is very dicey.

    Dicey because you say you trust your husband…he said he was under the influence of alcohol?

    Was the girl under the influence of alcohol too?…..why has her mother kept quiet?

    Its dicey because you say your husband has never done this before so its important for you to quickly resolve this matter and do not allow evil thoughts prevent you from healing your marriage.

    Trust is very important factor here: I want you to trust your husband because you know him better than anyone does…however,his decision not to send the girl away may raise eyebrows.

    My advice: trust him…trust him so you can heal and your marriage can heal…trust him not to do it again…

    Once is a mistake….twice is not a mistake…I hope it does not happen anymore.

    At least,make sure it does not happen in your home again. This girl and her mother should no longer be welcomed into your home.

    Ask God to help you find peace in trusting your husband: it means you are giving him the benefit of the doubt to show that you support him and are willing to be his loyal partner as long as he is loyal to your union.

    Do not dwell on the negatives…dwell on the positives. God bless you.


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