Help: The Women In My Family Are Lonely & Under A Curse

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Hello Jzhane,

My name is Amaka (not real name). I am 42 years old. I am single and I need your advice. Being a single lady in my age is not an easy thing. There are days when I consider suicide.

I have been depressed for so long. I have tried to live a positive life. I have read many books and tried different things like joining a gym club,rotary club,etc..just to be busy so that I will not be lonely.

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However,when its dark and there is no one beside me,the reality hits. I am alone. I try not to feel lonely but its hard. I have been in several relationships. Its not that men are not interested in me,alot of them are.

The problem is,the men coming for me are all married men. It seems the single men are not attracted to me.In fact,out of frustration,I dated a married man for 17 months until his wife found out and threatened me. I made up my mind to be single until a single man comes for me.

That was four years ago. Yes,4 whole years without a man in my life.

During all these times,my Auntie has called me to advice me severally  to settle down with any married man or get pregnant for a married man because I am getting older. She says its better I have a child now before its too late.

Actually my Auntie said,there is something happening in my father’s family that I inherited it: They say that the women in my father’s family do not get married. The one that get married end of getting divorced.

My father’s mother,who is my grandmother was impregnated by a man who did not marry her and it was a stigma in those days,o other man came for her hand in marriage then. My Auntie,who is my father’s elder sister left her marriage and has been single for as long as I can remember.

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Auntie Kk has advised me to settle down with a married man or at least have children by a married man if that is the only set of men coming for me. My mother was not married to my father. She got pregnant for him and gave birth to 3 children before she left. My father was not married when he died five years ago.

I am the most senior daughter of my father. My 2 other sisters from my father’s second baby mama are not married even though they are not as old as me. One is 36,the other is 35. The one that is 36 has children out of wedlock. Only the guys are married. My younger brothers are married. Same with my half brothers who some are not even up to 30 years.

You know as a Christian,I am struggling with the advice my Auntie gave me: how can I go and get pregnant for a married man? Is that the will of God for me? But if I don’t,will I die a sad and lonely woman that¬† I am right now? I need advice. I have fought this thing but it seems its not my fault,it seems its a family curse or something that women in my father’s family do not get married.

Why do single men nit come for me?Even at 42,I am fine. My figure is good. I dress well and I make good money from mu job. Why is this happening to me,how do I break out of this family curse?

I do not want to die a sad and lonely woman. Please advice me. What should I do?

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Amaka,

Umuahia

 

Photo Credit:Klitimg

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1 COMMENT

  1. Dear Amaka,

    First thing first…you need to work on your beliefs and mindset. A man is product of his beliefs and mind set.

    It may be true that your family has a curse but that curse will not work for anyone who refuses to allow the curse work.

    If you believe in a curse,that means that you believe in the negative supernatural. Now,you need to believe in the positive supernatural to counter the effects of the curse.

    You need to call on God,get born again and reject every trace of curses from your family. You need to believe that any man in Christ is a new creation,old things are past away and all things are new…so old curse are gone when you give your life to God.

    You then need to focus on what the word of God says about you and not what the curse says about you. Renew your mindset….

    Leave married men alone.God who gives good gifts will give you your own husband. If that does not happen,its better you adopt a child who has no parents. You can love and raise that child as your own.

    Do not be sad or feel lonely…its your state of mind…free yourself from the strong holds of your past. Its time to live free and brand new in God.

    And the joy that only God gives will come inside you. You do not need anyone to make you happy. If you feel sad,pray. Pray until you fall asleep. Do fun things that will help you stay happy.

    Volunteer at NGOs to help the helpless. Take yourself on vacations. Worship and spend time worshiping God.

    Self love: Learn how to fall in love with yourself. Appreciate the live and health God gave you. Do not envy others,chart your own course….keep declaring what God says about you instead.

    Remember,you are God’s child and you are special to him…nothing of your past or family’s past will have any power over you.

    Believe in God,believe in his saving power…believe God to give you a bright future and a bright hope…

    You will be fine.

    God bless you.

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