Tuesday, August 11, 2020
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Help: My Sister Is Inconsolable-What Do I Say To Her?

Hello LS,

My elder sister just finished talking to me on the phone for hours. She is devastated and wants to end her marriage of 8 years. I have been consoling her. Its such a pity. She relocated to US about 7 months ago. The plan was for her to go there first and work a way for her husband and the children to join her later.

Her children have their grand mother taking care of them. But there is a family nurse that comes when the children are not feeling well. While speaking to grandma,she mentioned that the Nurse came around but the children were ok..not sick.

When my sister asked her husband,he denied saying no one came. That grandma was imagining things. She asked the kids…kids being kids did not understand and said Nurse comes when they are sick.

For some reason,my sister sent the family electrician to go to the house and fix a CCTV camera when the husband was not around. She did that more out of safety for her kids not cos she suspected anything. She could view the camera on her phone all the way from abroad.

That was how she saw her husband sneaking in the family Nurse into their matrimonial room almost every night. She has cried and cried. The funny thing is,the husband and the children’s’ visa is ready and she wants to take only her children,no longer her husband anymore.

She feels betrayed and wants to leave the man alone in Nigeria. The husband has been begging and begging.

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Please what do you advise? She says she cannot take a cheating man abroad. She is sponsoring almost 90% of the relocation.

Advise her please ma. She will be reading comments.

 

LS Whatsapp Member

 

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Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

2 COMMENTS

  1. Hello,

    Your sister is in shock and needs time to process what just happened. Let her process it.

    There maybe hope after she has processed what happened and perhaps may want to listen to anyone for a possible process of reconciliation.

    For now, there is no point begging her to take the man with her…she needs to be at peace with the fact that he betrayed her first. Maybe then,she can learn to heal and possibly forgive him.

    Let her do whatever she feels like doing. The man has to keep begging and fight to have his marriage back. He needs too prove he can be trusted again.

    Until then,let her do what she wants to do but at least she did not mention divorce…pray for them. Let God help them through this trying period.

    On your own,just be supportive as much as you can. Pray for her..pray for the family….this too shall come to pass.

    God bless

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