Thursday, November 14, 2019
Home Advice Can A Man Truly Forgive A Cheating Woman:Please Advise

Can A Man Truly Forgive A Cheating Woman:Please Advise

Dear Lively Stones,

Hmm,where do I start from…let me start sha. I was in a relationship with a guy that I loved so much. I could do anything for him. He too loved me so much. But after a while,we broke up.He accused me of cheating. We both were guilty,he had his own cheating too.

So after like two years,I met someone . As we talked,I found out he was a cousin to my ex. He said that cousin that was my ex was getting married. We dated for for a year,he proposed and I said yes.

At my fiance’s sister’s 50th birthday,I met my ex. Other family members and friends were in attendance. My ex and I exchanged pleasantries. After a while,at the party,my ex asked me to follow him and like a sheep I did. Till today,I cannot explain what happened. All know is,I followed him to his car and f*cked him.

I got myself after the deed. He said we should never tell anyone. I quietly collected my things and hailed a taxi back home …leaving my fiance back at the party that night….switched off my phone. Next day,fiance came to my place…seriously worried about me…wanting to know why I left the way I did…

After crying and telling him I dont expect him to forgive me,I told him what happened. He was queit…and later got really very upset. He left and sent me a text that it was over. I have lobg since accepted my faith….until two days ago when he came back saying he wants us to put this behind us and wants me back.

As happy as that made me feel….I am beyond scared of marrying someone who I slept with his cousin. I am not perfect. I have been cheated on and I have cheated….but I am not sure..I am actually terrified of my fiance. I feel he will not truly put this behind him…what do you think…

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Jzhane
A passionate people and godly relationship advocate!...Trained Psychologist and Human Resources Practioner. A seasoned Marriage and relationship counsellor. A mother, wife, sister, friend and daughter. J

3 COMMENTS

  1. Hello,

    The foundation of this relationship needs to be firm and solid before you go ahead with marriage. Its sweet thing to be forgiven but only time will tell if he can actually forget it.

    So,I would say give it time. See how the relationship is able to bounce back. Build on new friendship and trust.

    I would even say see a therapist. The cheating must have been triggered by something,maybe you are not completely over your ex.

    Its very rare to find a man who can forgive a cheating spouse…this is one of these rare cases…you need to earn his trust again..give it time while seeing a therapist to address all issues that led to the cheating to avoid further occurrence.

    Cheers

  2. You should been disciplined enough to overcome such temptation. How will two blood sleep with you? The habit of cheating is in you

    • This is so judgemental. This person has judge herself, she doesn’t need this. It would have been better to keep silent than dish out such judgement. thank you

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